So, here it is. Blog numero uno. one. ya got it?
So, before i start complaining, maybe i should explain "me" a bit. I'm a college student, 3rd year, going for Mass Comm: Photojournalism, minoring in English: Creative Writing. Yada, yada, yada.
So, I have a common problem that errbody has... i have gained some weight--
now let me back up- in high school, i was so thin, and everyone always thought i wasn't eating, or something else crazy like that- and it wasn't true at all- i ate, but i had my heart broken- REAL BAD- and it did affect how i felt about myself, and kind of made my appetite less- but i don't think it made me thin, just happened ya know?
also, i always had this weird pain in my side- like i felt like i couldn't do anything! so, from junior year to my first year of college, i was anywhere from 116-123 lbs- happily.
NOW-- ever since i had sort of got over this guy and etc, there's been weight creeping on me.
I didn't realize it right away, until i started living with 3 strangers last year, and i had my own apartment (not just a dorm with no where to keep food) and had little time to eat rather than between work and class!
But a strange thing started to happen, that 'pain' i used to get- (i used to get it soo bad i would have to leave work, doctors couldn't find what was wrong) it started going away. So now i'm thinking maybe i really was underweight or something and i didn't know- like 123 lbs doesn't sound underweight for someone who's 5'7ish ya know?
so i decided to weigh myself one day and got a complete shock! i couldn't believe it- and from there it's just gotten worse- i've never had to lose weight before, and now it's almost like i don't know how- i mean i know all the rules and etc but i can't keep myself on it because i am not used to not eating what i want- and i am also kind of scared for that pain to come back- but weight is like the one thing in my life that i just am so unhappy about- i need to lose weight and be happy about myself, i'm not saying i need to be 115 lbs again, and i am not even super big now i just feel so different then i was, i just wish i could stick to something.
i know this is just talking about it - but - hopefully one step closer to getting on some type of plan...again... ugh .. help!
dana2love
